In the tradition I grew up with, funerals were never expensive or showy. Death was not a time for display. It was a quiet and sacred moment—a time for silence, reflection, and support from the community.
In those days, a family in mourning was not even allowed to cook. Lighting a fire in the house was avoided. People understood that the pain of loss was already too heavy.
Relatives from both sides would take responsibility. They cooked in their own homes and brought food to the grieving family. The message was simple: You are hurting. Sit and mourn. We will support you.
But now, things have changed.
Today, many people go to bereaved homes not just to offer support, but to eat and drink. Some even complain about food, argue over portions, and judge the funeral based on arrangements or entertainment.
Even worse, there is now pressure on the grieving family to give gifts or souvenirs, as if a funeral is a celebration.
These practices are not part of our true tradition. They are new habits that add more pain to already broken hearts.
If we truly want to respect our culture, we must talk about this change.
Funerals were never meant to be parties.
They were meant to be moments of dignity, unity, and humanity.
If we truly want to honour the dead, we should not put extra pressure on the living.
Let us bring back the true meaning of mourning—simple, respectful, and supportive.
I strongly stand by this.